Final Post - Part I

Thanks so much, if you are still checking this! I have made it safely back to the U.S., and am gathering my thoughts for some final reflections. Before I left, however, I gave a sermon at Mandiram, which sums up some of what I learned during my time in India. This is it! Eventually, I will also post my final reflection letter... once I write it.

Mundakapadam Mandirams Society Ecumenical Church

Cammy Crane

22 July 2007

The Bible passages from this Sunday all deal with the subject of “calling.” God called Moses to lead the Hebrews out of Egypt; Jesus called Simon to tend to his flock; and the letter to Timothy calls us to look out for one another. From Moses to Simon to us, we are all called by God. God calls us to care for each other, to love each other, and to respect each other. We are called to do this in every moment of our lives. Even our smallest action should be an echo of God’s call to live as an unbroken community.

I believe that God called me to come to India. I left my home and everyone I knew in the U.S. for one year to learn more about this calling and this community that I just spoke of. I came to learn more about answers to questions like the following:
How does God call me, as an American, to live a life that is respectful and loving to you in India?
How does God expect us to create a harmonious community out of such a broken world?
As I said before, I believe that God called me to India… but I also believe that God called you to be my community, my teachers, the ones from whom I would learn more about the answers to these questions. Through your actions and your words, I have learned more about what it means to be a community – a responsible and loving global community.

At the beginning of my year here, someone asked me, “How are Indian people different from American people?” After thinking for a moment, I replied, “We are all the same people. We are just living in different cultures and societies.” Inherently, we are all the same. Americans, Africans, Indians – we all have the same emotions, we all need the same love, we all have the same dreams of justice. Our bones are made from the same material. The same blood flows through our veins. Sometimes, we forget this, and we treat people as if they were not human, as if they do not feel the same pain as us. We forget that we are all, essentially, the same.

Ancient Indian wisdom says that “A person who sees everyone in his or her own self, and his or her own self in everyone, loses all fear.” To me, this means that when we realize that we are all essentially the same, we lose all fear of each other and are able to live in loving, responsible community with each other.
People all over the world forget this knowledge, and they grow to fear each other. This fear drives people to sin, and this grows into sinful systems. Hatred, jealousy, and discrimination are just a few of the sins that come out of our fear of each other. No loving community can exist where these evils exist.

I have been so impressed all year by the way you have welcomed me into your community and by the way you have loved me without question. You saw the sameness in us, and you did not fear me, or distrust me, or discriminate against me. I was treated not as a stranger, but as a friend. This is true community. Imagine if everyone were treated this way! Hindus and Muslims, Israelis and Palestinians, Americans and Iraqis, all living with each other. You have shown me a glimpse of a loving, responsible community. It is this way of life that God has called us to live – one where we recognize that all people need to be loved and cared for and strangers are recognized as friends. And for showing me that, I want to say… “Nanni!”

Jesus asked Simon three times, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Simon did love Jesus, so Jesus then instructed him to tend to his sheep. Jus as Simon’s love was to lead him to action, our love for God should lead us to action as well. It should lead us to tend to our fellow sheep, our fellow human beings. Love for God should lead us to live out our calling to be part of a unified community. In other words, just as Simon’s love for God was to lead him to love and care for Jesus’ flock, our love for God should lead us to love others, the flock with which we live. I have seen the beauty of a loving community here at Mandiram, but India has also shown me how ugly a broken community can be. This is not to say that there is not brokenness in the U.S. There certainly is. In a way, though, I have learned more about the American community and its brokenness by witnessing the broken parts of the Indian community. Sexism, racism, caste-ism, and religious discrimination are still far too prevalent in Indian society and in American society. Too often, we forget that our love for God should elad us to love others without question, and without discrimination. It should lead us to treat everyone equally. It should lead to a well-tended flock; a responsible, loving community without sexism, racism, caste-ism or any form of hatred and inequality.

In one week, I will be returning to the U.S. But I will not be returning without having changed. This year has made me realize how much action God calls us to take in the world. We are called to heal the sick. We are called to build houses for our neighbors. We are called to care for our environment. We are called to raise our children. We are called to tend to this flock, to create unity in our communities where there is discord. And the truth is, this whole world is our community! We are each called, in our own ways, to care for our brothers and sisters around the world. This only happens by living each moment of our lives with a dream of equality and a passion to love in our hearts.

Someone once told me that finding God is like standing in a ring of people, and God is in the center of that ring. Each time you come closer to God, you take a step forward, a step closer to God. And as the others in the right come to know God more, they also take a step closer to the center of the ring. Soon, the size of the ring gets smaller and smaller as people move closer to the center. But the number of people in the ring does not get smaller, so soon, you find yourself smashed against other people. Come closer to God means coming closer to other people! If you truly love God, then love others, fight for equality, and live out your calling to community with that same passion. Create that loving, responsible community that God has called us to.

I will never forget you all and the love you have given me. I am so blessed to have had the opportunity to know you. I am grateful that you accepted me as one of you, and I hope that you continue this pattern of acceptance and love of others, no matter the color of their skin, their religion or their caste. For only by doing this will we ever live out God’s calling.

Ni

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Malayalam is a very complicated language. Sometimes, it takes about 100 syllables to say something seemingly simple. Other times, a lot can be said in one syllable.

One of my closest friends here is Liji, who lives with and tutors the young girls at Balika Mandiram. She had seemed very upset one night, and when I asked her about it the next morning, she explained. People had been calling her "ni." In Malayalam, "ni" means "you" in a very informal way. I silently thanked my Malayalam teacher for telling me to call everyone "ningal," which is a more formal way of saying "you," and asked Liji more about the problem. "Ni," she explained, isn't just informal. It's a way of asserting your superiority over someone else. By calling her "ni," these people have been telling her "You're just the hired help, and I can treat you however I want and call you whatever I want." The day before, some people had yelled at Liji (and also at her sister, who works at the nearby hospital) for things that neither of them had any control over, calling them "ni" in the process. The problem, though, is that so many people have been calling Liji "ni." The yelling from the night before was just the last straw. As she spoke, there were tears in her eyes.

A lot can be said in just one syllable.

In Spanish, there are two forms of "you." "Tu" is the informal, "usted" the formal. When I was in Spain, our teachers cautioned us in our usage of these words. Many people doesn't like being called "usted" anymore, because it connotes a sense of distance and a lack of friendship. We were told just to use it with the elderly. But after seeing the look on my host grandfather's face the first time I called him "usted," I used the informal "tu" on everyone.

In Kerala, though, "ni" does not connote friendship and closeness. Friends are to be revered, to be upheld and loved. Using "ni" does not do that.

In Malayalam, Liji told me, it is best to just call everyone by their name.

Rain, Rain, (Don't) Go Away

Last week, the monsoon rains came to Kerala. And after drenching us in delicious coolness for two and a half days, they left as suddenly as they had arrived.

My advisor told me that the monsoon got turned around and ended up in Oman. My neighbors told me that it got held up by something in the Arabian Sea (no one knows what that something is). The weather people keep promising that it will arrive tomorrow. All I know is - I WANT THE MONSOON BACK!

One evening after the monsoon rains, I was sitting outside on the porch with some of the young girls. Leya-kutty came outside, humming a little tune to herself. She walked up to a flower bush and gave it a big, wet hug, then picked up a leafy stick nearby. She carried it over to the porch and started planting it in a pile of gravel, all the while singing a hymn to herself. She was so obviously pleased with life at that moment. We all were! We were outside, and we weren't sweating. The air was cool, the sun was low, and everyone was getting along. Life just seemed so perfectly pleasant.

And of course, there's the practicality of needing water. India, for the most part, is very dry. Kerala is lucky to get two monsoon seasons, but the state still has to be careful about its water consumption. Wells have been dry for months here. The rains don't just make life more pleasant; they are life-giving!

Yesterday, it rained a little bit. Today, it sprinkled some more. Maybe tomorrow... torrential downpour?

Northern India Pictures`

Now that I'm back from our tour - and am FINALLY able to post! - I thought I'd share some photos with you.

Varanasi

Napping at the Taj Mahal
A Monk Debate in Dharamsala
Me in Jodhpur

Andy, and his cow friend, at the beach in Goa